In week 4, Heisman Trophy hopeful, John Mateer of the resurgent Oklahoma Sooners broke a bone in his right hand, his throwing hand. His right thumb, to be exact. It has been widely reported that Dr. Steven Shin, the “best hand and wrist doctor in the country”, will perform the repair, if he hasn’t done it already. The prognosis is that he will miss a month.

In my opinion, a guy that plays three quarters with a broken thumb on his throwing hand and beats a good Auburn team will not miss the game with their most hated rival, the Texas Longhorns, on October 11^th. The Sooner’s team doctors are, I’m sure, adept at creating poultices with dirt, some spit, and probably a small smear of poop from both “Boomer” and “Sooner”. They’ll tape all that up on his hand until it looks like Jason Pierre-Paul’s, but he WILL play against Texas! Oh yes! He will play! (You have to read that last part in your best Wayne Campbell voice. You know, Wayne Campbell? Wayne’s World? Sheesh, I can’t believe I have to explain this stuff!! Lol!)